This one single word ‘Maa” (Mother) is so powerful. It has been used with a lot of love and affection in most Hindi films, sometimes there is hatred too but more often than not, it turns into love by the end of the story.
Maa hee Shrishti banati hai aur Shrishti dikhati hai,
Maa hee Shirishti hai.
(A mother creates our Universe and a mother shows us the Universe, A mother is Universe, herself).
But this puts a lot of pressure on mothers and mothers – to – be. A mother must know the following things to lead a balanced life.
1. Make your needs a priority
Your needs as a person and as a parent are very important. Women while performing her role and duty as a mother forgets about her own self. One has to be conscious of one’s own needs and try to fulfill them. ‘You’ are important.
2. Don’t try to be perfect
It’s understandable that you want to play the role of a perfect mother, but then no one is perfect. There are going to be situations that fall outside the line of control but it doesn’t require you to become hyper. In fact, being relaxed in such situations is the way to be.
3. Guilt can wait
There are going to be times when you order food from outside since you are too exhausted to cook, motherhood is a full – time job and you can’t expect yourself to be the best at it, all the time. There are going to be days when you have to be somewhere, which is equally important, and you can’t be with your kids. Guilt has a way of finding you but don’t let it succeed.
4. Patience is the key
Being patient and taking charge of the situation is what you need. Sometimes, your kids won’t behave like you want them to or maybe they will not listen to you blindly. Be rest assured, if you show some patience, they will come around.
5. Be a good listener
There are days when your kids need someone who will just listen to what they have to say. Their complaints, their rants, their opinion or their suggestion. It could be anything. You don’t have to offer a solution all the time, but just listen to what they have to say. It’s difficult cause maa sab janti hai, (A mother knows everything) but then there are times when you will have to really focus.
6. Role of a mother vs. role of a friend
There is a thin line between being a mother and being a friend. While you want to be the one your kids confide in, you also want to be the one who can tell them right from wrong and sometimes take a stricter way instead of the easy way. For those days, you want to let them know you are elder, more experienced and love them enough to know what’s right. Taking your child’s point of view into consideration is also very important. Healthy discussions should always be welcomed.
7. Learn and preach simplicity
Teach your kids earlier in life (preferably before they turn into rebellious teenagers) to be simple. This happens only if you imbibe simplicity and teach them the value of knowledge over money, the futility of material possessions and to love fellow humans and animals. Don’t make shopping a fun trip. This gives your children an idea of buying only what they need.
8. Don’t push your kids too hard
Don’t ask them to be a certain way or push them too hard towards their goals. Treat them as intelligent people and they will reciprocate the same. The generation gap becomes easier if there is enough communication.
9. Don’t project your fears on your kids
You want them to learn from your lessons but avoid projecting your fears on your kids. Maybe they will fall and learn. End of the day, it’s their journey and you can only guide them. Forcing them to do a certain thing will only push you away from them.
10. Make your kids self reliant
You must teach your kids to value money. Even if you have excess, one must avoid spoiling them silly. It’s easier to buy whatever they desire (and sometimes don’t need) than teaching them how you can afford it but don’t want to buy it for them. This teaches them the real value of earning money. They should be rewarded when they cross milestones, but one shouldn’t go overboard with it.
11. Teach your kids to read
Reading opens a whole new world. It works on your child’s imagination, reading and writing skills and over all development. A mother should imbibe this habit because the kids learn from what they see.
12. Laugh a lot and be honest
The most important thing is to be honest with your kids. If your kids see you lying, they will learn to lie as well. Although, sometimes little lies makes our lives easier, we must avoid it.
Laughing a lot is also important. Find humor in small things, laugh at yourself and the kids will learn to laugh with you, sometimes at you but mostly at themselves.
We at Trend Mantra wish you a happy and peaceful motherhood.